Yesterday I received another batch of Christmas catalogs in the mail which means (Ta-DA!) it’s almost Halloween! Today when I stepped into Wally World, I was confronted with a large display featuring reindeer and a sleigh full of colorfully wrapped boxes. Must be time for the Great Pumpkin. Actually, since the end of September, my neighborhood has been gearing up. The house around the corner has a yard full of fake tombstones (which actually complement the dirt and weeds). Across the street they’ve hung white gauze “ghosts” from the tree and the people next door put orange lights in every window and a motion-activated skeleton that jumps and shrieks when someone walks past. The house on the other side has a display of carved pumpkins and a large rubber rat that makes horrible choking and gagging sounds. Jolly good fun! When did Halloween develop into this elaborate holiday? And how much does all… Read More »
Please don’t sit at the end of the row
Why do people get somewhere early, park themselves at the end of the row and then glare when someone asks to get by? Has this not happened to you? In a concert or church or anywhere with open seating. I realize they want the prized “end seat” so they can be first out and perhaps get out of the parking lot ahead of the other thousands of people, but surely they understand that when they sit at the end of the row, other people are going to need to get past them. So why do they get so upset when you ask to get by? It happened again this morning in church. A woman had parked herself at the end of an empty row and simply sat there as I stood mutely for a few seconds, waiting for her to make eye contact. She didn’t, so I finally said, “excuse… Read More »
The “Giant Economy Size”
What’s so great about the “Giant Economy Size”? The idea, of course, is that you get a lot more product for only a bit more money. Hah! They’ve hoodwinked us right out of our wallets. That huge box of cereal isn’t full of cereal. It’s half full of cereal and half full of air. And does the “Giant Economy Size” fit in your cupboard? It does not. In the olden days — like the middle of the last century — they built houses with sensible cupboards to accommodate sensible size boxes. And bottles. Yeah, it’s not just the boxes, it’s the bottles, too. As a rule, I don’t use 4 letter words, but last weekend was a “3 Day Sale” at Sprouts and I have to say it — my favorite four letter word is SALE! When I see that word, common sense just flies right out of my head.… Read More »
Visiting (the People’s Republic of ) California
Recently I had reason to drive down to California. L.A., to be specific. Slightly over an hour after leaving Las Vegas, one passes the final set of casinos and crosses the state line into California. There is a sign saying “Welcome to California” which puzzled me for a few minutes — several pieces of the state seemed to be missing and I was wondering if this was intended to portray the state as it might look after The Big One. But no, I realized, the missing pieces were actually part of the silhouette of the bear. This being the Bear Republic. This is almost immediately followed by a sign that says “seat belt law strictly enforced.” Okay, fair warning. In Nevada we have a campaign that says “click it or ticket” with the picture of a seat belt. Not quite as authoritarian, perhaps a little catchier, but we all get… Read More »
Oh, the glorious mute button!
Recently I got a new TV– one with a mute button. “Don’t all TVs have a mute button?” you may ask. Well, yes, I imagine they do, but the one on my new TV actually works! I’ve known for some time that I needed a new TV. I noticed that often Pat Sajak was only half a person at the edge of the screen, or people would be looking off to the side at something I was unable to see. For the amount of time I watch TV, it wasn’t really a big deal. After all, I know what Pat Sajak looks like, and I know that if I can’t see what’s off to the side of the screen on NCIS it’ll soon be made clear. But the last straw was when the remote stopped working. First of all, the up and down arrows wouldn’t work to scan the channels… Read More »
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